two in one day? unheard of. but this is really just a supplement to ensure you that the feeling of this morning has only deepened and evolved into a completely restless ragey madness.

perhaps just bored? just tired? just both, most likely. pushed to pull apart. all this despite listening to heavy doses of whatever i can get my hands on and peeling my fingernails apart and rushing downstairs for cigarettes whenever i deem it necessary.

i wish i could find my head somewhere in this mess. i hope and also don't hope that this is all just a matter of not having slept nearly enough. i can't even find anything to spend my fucking money on in order to try to alleviate some of the energy. that is the sad state of affairs.